


A Kiss for a Scar

by whatsanapocalae



Category: The Evil Within (Video Game)
Genre: Anal Fingering, Body Image, Body Worship, Depression, Dissociation, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Happy Ending, Kissing, M/M, Men Crying, Oral Sex
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-10-22
Updated: 2018-10-22
Packaged: 2019-08-05 20:25:08
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,046
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16374452
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/whatsanapocalae/pseuds/whatsanapocalae
Summary: He's in a bad state, in his own head, and the only excuse that he has for Sebastian is his body. So Sebastian shows him exactly how he feels about Stefano's body in turn.Really it's just body worship and there's the same headcanons for Stefano's body as there are in a Doctor in Union.





	A Kiss for a Scar

Stefano was, as he often was, far away. Even though he was sitting on the couch, watching television in the kind of clothes that he would never want anyone to see him in but made him look rich and luxurious all the same, he wasn’t there. His face was dull, his eyes glazed over, and he was in that place in his mind, that Sebastian didn’t know how to enter.

He tossed down the dish towel and sighed. He didn’t know what to do. He never knew what to do. Stefano was only there physically at times and at other times it was clear that he was fighting the current of his thoughts, fighting the urge to drown in them, and that was usually when he or Lily were in front of him. It was a lot of work, pretending to be okay. Sebastian did it too. He didn’t want Stefano feeling the need to retreat into himself.

He stepped over the threshold, from his space of chores and hardwood, and into Stefano’s, filled with carpeting and the cold claws of depression.

“Anything good on?” he asked.

Stefano tilted his head slightly, as if trying to hear if the buzzing in his ear was from an insect or inside of him. He hadn’t heard Sebastian. Sebastian took a few more steps over. When he put his hand on Stefano’s shoulder, he jumped, turning on him, eye wild as he was pulled from whatever was going on behind it.

“Hey, you okay?” Sebastian pressed, rubbing his thumb into the muscle of Stefano’s shoulder, not finding it easily through the thick and overly soft navy sweater that he wore.

Stefano’s lips tightened and he looked back at the television. “I suppose. It’s nothing for you to worry about.”

Sebastian sat on the couch beside him, all the same, not moving his hand from its spot but putting the other on his knee. “You’re staring off at nothing and your not responsive. I haven’t seen you eat today either. Don’t forget who I am, okay? I’m a professional worrier.”

“That you are.” Stefano’s smile looked forced. He still wasn’t looking. “This is my burden though. You have no need for it. You have Lily to carry, not me.”

He raised his hand from Stefano’s knee to place it on his face, under all that hair. Stefano sometimes balked at that, sometimes laughed, but right now he just sat there, a million miles away, letting Sebastian do whatever he wanted.

“I want to carry you too. I want to be there for you,” Sebastian stated, leaning forward. He needed Stefano to hear him. “In Union, you saved my ass more times than I could count. I want to be able to do the same for you.”

“This isn’t important.”

“It is. It’s hurting you, so it must be.”

Stefano sighed, relaxing finally. He put his hands out onto Sebastian’s shoulders. “Sometimes, I do not understand you, Sebastian. That’s all this is. There’s you and Lily and you are strong for her and you are strong on your own. When you put your mind to something there’s no stopping you. You deserve someone who can match you.”

“You do match me,” Sebastian interrupted, hoping that he hadn’t.

“Only in there,” Stefano’s smile was lopsided and self deprecating. “Out here, where we are real? I have had to lean on you every step of the way. I am unable to do anything for myself. I am not even able to create anything new,” his hands were shaking. His hands were always shaking. Nerve damage, he’d said, so long ago, back when he was getting better, with all of the physical therapy and hospital visits, trying to get back to himself after so long in STEM. He was unable to take a single photograph with hands so shaky. “I am not what I should be. I am not much of anything. I am not the man you deserve.”

“You say deserved as if it’s something real,” Sebastian wanted to lean forward, to kiss those words out of Stefano’s mouth. He didn’t want them to fall anymore. “Instead of caring about what I deserve, what about what I want? Because I do want you, in any way that I can have you.”

Stefano’s smile deepened, became something real, finally. “Even with this? Even with my body the way that it is?” This was a closer issue, one that Sebastian has had to deal with a few times. Stefano held himself well, even his lounge wear made him look like some sort of God, but the things that he hid, the scars under that sweater, the leg that never wanted to work when he needed it to under those designer lounge pants, the fingers that missed nerves, not to mention his eye, were astronomical. Everything else was a cover up, some way for him to compensate for the damage done to him.

Sebastian raised his hand, let his fingers trace the scar tissue around his eye. “I wouldn’t change a single thing about you.”

Stefano’s eye widened for a different reason, a different kind of shock, and then he relaxed and there were tears in that eye as his smile widened. “If I didn’t think your fingers would end up somewhere terrible I would surge forward to kiss you.”

Sebastian kissed him instead, loving the way that that smile felt against his own lips, not pushing, just letting the kiss happen. He didn’t want to rush anything, but he wanted to show Stefano what he meant, wanted him to know exactly what he thought of those gauges and wounds, of that mass of tissue where his eye was.

“Please,” he whispered, his arm going around Stefano’s neck, leaving his sweater, holding him closer, “please, let me.”

He heard a chortle, “Well, if that’s all you want-

Sebastian cut him off with a stare, harsh and earnest and to the point. He didn’t want to be with Stefano for sex, just to use him. That was what he was implying though. That was what he must have assumed. Sebastian’s look was enough to cut him short though and he looked down at Sebastian with such an urge, such a need, that couldn’t be put into words. It wasn’t lust, not in the conventional sense. It was a need, a terrible need, to be desired, to feel that desire.

“I do want, but not what you think. Would you let me?” He slipped his hand out from under Stefano’s hair, letting the strands run between his fingers.

Stefano looked unsure, not knowing exactly what it was that Sebastian meant. He nodded though, and when Sebastian skimmed down his chest, folding himself between his legs, he sighed, the motion making his chest rumble.

“Okay if I take this off?” Sebastian asked, holding the edges of the sweater. It was so beautiful on him, plush and soft, the blue making his eye look like ice, the contours of his skin deep and radiant, all angles surrounded in soft coils of merino wool.

Stefano nodded and raised his arms. Sebastian took it off slowly, looking at the canvas before him as he did, trying to decide what he wanted to paint on it, where he wanted to start. When the sweater was safely dropped onto the coffee table, Stefano looked Sebastian over with expectation, as if he knew exactly what Sebastian intended. He had no idea how wrong he was.

He pressed chaste kisses to Stefano’s stomach, right where his hips jutted out from the elastic of his designer pants. There were only two scars here, his bellybutton and another, near it, long and narrow, not too deep. Sebastian flattened his tongue and licked up both of them, resting his hands on either of Stefano’s hips, gently pinning them down.

“Exquisite,” he murmured, pressing his nose to Stefano’s naval to kiss at the thick hair that grew around it. “You know how many models would starve themselves to look like this?”

“SebaAHH!” the man squirmed, trying to say something foolish, as Sebastian raised his attention upward, to scrap his teeth along Stefano’s ribs. He paid more attention to Stefano’s right side, kissing and licking at every scar and mole that he found, biting at the ribs that became more and more pronounced as Stefano’s breath became harsher.

“Beautiful, I don’t know what you do with that camera of yours. This, here, this is true art.”

Stefano whined, bucking against him. He didn’t care if Stefano believed him. Right now, it was good enough that he was hearing him. Sebastian straddled his hips, feeling that his attentions to Stefano’s body was starting to get a reaction out of it, seeing the goosebumps spreading along his chest, his erection half filled under Sebastian’s ass.

He brought his hands up, spread his hot fingers over Stefano’s shoulders, pinning him against the couch. “You’re so broad Stefano, you could carry mountains with these.” Stefano bit his lip, watching Sebastian with colorless eyes, his pupils fully dilated. He knew this would get a good reaction. Stefano lived off of praise. Sebastian should have been giving him that since their first day back. “Your chest could hold so much, your heart and mine as well. It’s so expansive.”

He bent down to take a nipple in his teeth, to twist and lick at it. He knew that Stefano’s nipples weren’t all that sensitive but the whining took a higher pitch then and Stefano’s hips slid up against the cleft in Sebastian’s behind with a needy urgency.

“You are awe inspiring Stefano, like this, for me. Absolutely magnificent.”

Stefano brought a hand to his mouth, biting against a knuckle, keeping his eye closed, as if none of this was real, as if he was trying to contain himself. Sebastian took that hand away and brought it to his own lips, kissing each knuckle before sucking two of the digits deep into his mouth, humming and he bobbed on them, as if they were Stefano’s long cock, keeping his eyes half lidded. Stefano gasped, his other hand grabbing onto Sebastian’s shirt, knotting it between white knuckles.

“Galaxies,” Sebastian exclaimed as he released them, kissing down to his palm, “You’ve created so many other worlds with these fingers, put so much thought onto paper, into clay, with these hands. I could never do that. No one could do that, not the way you do.”

There were tears in Stefano’s eyes and Sebastian knew that a large part of it was that Stefano was having such a hard time creating anything, that he hated these hands for not obeying his whims. He took the other hand and gave it the same treatment. Stefano was fully hard beneath him now and Sebastian wanted it, wanted him, wanted him to come undone, just like this, wanted to ride him and feel him from the inside, lighting him up like a flash. He hadn’t even gotten to his face yet and he was already so close to giving in.

When he released Stefano’s hands they were on him in an instant, pulling at the hem of his shirt, trying to get it off. Sebastian was just as hard as he was, just as willing, but he took those hands in his own and raised them over Stefano’s body, holding them together with one of his own so he could run his hand over Stefano’s torso once more.

“Unbelievable.”

And he was kissing Stefano, starving for him, tongue and lips and teeth scraping against his lips and his mouth filling with him. He wanted more of him. He ran his tongue against Stefano’s teeth, loving the rumble of Stefano’s moan against him. He had more. He had more to say. There was so much of Stefano that he wanted to press love and affection into. He knew that his appearance wasn’t the only thing that was bothering him, it was just the easiest, but it was the easiest one to fix as well.

Sebastian trailed kisses along Stefano’s jaw, to his ear and when he got there he traced the lobe and the shape of it with his tongue, feeling Stefano quake beneath him, almost wanting to pull away as his whine elongated into a single note.

“I want you to know exactly how I feel about you, Stefano, I want you to see in the mirror what I see, I want you to know how hard it is to go through the motions of the day without my hands on you, without my lips on you. I wish you could know just how badly I need you all the time.”

The tears in Stefano’s eye started to fall, trailing silently down his cheek. Sebastian didn’t fight the tears, he didn’t have a problem with them. This was good, getting the feelings out, feeling overwhelmed by such care. Sebastian kissed up the trail of them and kissed his closed eyelid. “You have such long eyelashes, Stefano, they’re so thick and dark. I love how, when we kiss sometimes, I can feel you open your eye to check on me, and I can feel them tickling my cheek.”

Stefano looked like he was going to argue but then Sebastian was pushing his hair back with his free hand and Stefano was squirming, trying to hide that side of his face.

“This doesn’t bother me, Stefano,” he promised but he let that hair fall back over the scar tissue, “I’d like to do the same for it as everything else, because I love every part of you.”

He kissed the tip of Stefano’s nose instead and let go of his wrists, pleased to see that Stefano kept them in place so he could drag his hands back down to Stefano’s waist, ready for the next step.

“What do you want, Stefano?”

Stefano opened his mouth and what came out was an airy moan, as if he couldn’t form the words.

“I didn’t get that Stefano?”

“Fuck me. Please, Sebastian, I need you to fuck me.” He opened that eye and stared at him with such conviction that Sebastian’s mouth went dry at that as much as it did the concept. He’d never fucked Stefano before. Stefano had always made it apparent who would be fucking who in the bedroom, and it was usually Sebastian on his knees before him, filled and begging for more. This was unexpected and there was no way he would argue it.

He got off of Stefano and held out his hand, helping him up off of the couch. Both of them looked a bit silly, sweaty and overwhelmed, so hard that their pants were tenting the best that they could. Stefano’s legs were a bit weak from being sat on and Sebastian picked him up easily, making them both laugh. Lily was at school, they still had a few hours to themselves. There was no need to rush. There was no need for anything, aside from one another.

Sebastian took them up the stairs and deposited Stefano on the bed, stripping him of those lounge pants that made him look better than most did in a full suit. Stefano’s legs fell open, revealing his stiff cock, the tip red and shiny with precome. Sebastian licked his lips at the sight of it, as well as that promised hole hidden behind his balls and all of that hair.

He ran his fingers through the thick hair, both on his chest and down to his erection and down his thighs.

“You really don’t mind that, do you?” Stefano asked.

“I’ve never been with someone hairier than me,” Sebastian smiled, “I wouldn’t change it for anything.”

He lifted one of Stefano’s legs and kissed his knee, bringing his lips up to the sensitive parts of Stefano’s thigh, making him squirm once more as Sebastian’s beard tickled him as his mouth sucked at the pale flesh.

“Your skin is so soft.”

“Give me your hand,” Stefano asked, softly, so softly that it sounded like something to be cherished. Sebastian obeyed without question and Stefano drizzled the cold lube onto his fingers.

Sebastian brought himself forward, letting his fingers slip around Stefano’s rim, one of them pressing gently against his entrance. His tongue slid up the strong muscle on the bottom of Stefano’s cock, wetting it as well as his hole, so he could take the plunge. He pushed in to the first knuckle, not much but already Stefano felt looser than he’d expected, as if all of the care had gotten him relaxed and ready, as if he really did want this and wasn’t just trying to repay Sebastian for his care so far.

He sucked the head of Stefano’s cock into his mouth, swirling his tongue around it before sliding it under his foreskin. Stefano gasped and his finger slid in without him even trying, down to the next knuckle. He released Stefano’s head and looked at him, finding that eye open and on him, the adoration that he felt reflected back at him. He gave Stefano a small smile, innocent, and swallowed his cock as far as he could. Stefano gasped and his head fell back and his rectum tightened around Sebastian’s finger pleasantly. Sebastian hummed, sucking him as he started to rock that finger in and out of him, listening to the litany falling from Stefano’s mouth, even though he couldn’t understand a word of it.

But then Stefano’s hand was in his hair and his grip was tight and he was shoving Sebastian off of him. Sebastian retreated, pulling his hands away and displaying them, sitting on his calves and far away, just in case something had gone wrong.

“You’re fine,” Stefano panted, his chest visibly shifting with his heavy breaths. “Just, I don’t want to come yet. I want you inside of me first.”

“Are you sure?” Sebastian asked, knowing that there was a reason that Stefano had never given him this before.

“I’m sure. I want this, Sebastian. I want you. I want you to hurry up as well.”

Sebastian laughed at that but got a bit more lube to slick up his fingers and went back to work, this time just teasing Stefano’s cock with licks and kisses as he slid two fingers into him, pressing deep and then bending them to push against the muscles as he pulled them back out, spreading them inside of Stefano to make him gasp.

Sebastian pulled his fingers out and finally undressed himself, careful not to get lube on his jeans. Only then did he drizzle his cock in more of the cold liquid, more than he probably needed to but he could feel nervousness make him shake a bit already. One more look to Stefano’s face and he nodded, certain, pushing Sebastian to get on with it.

Sebastian pressed against him and then, slowly, pushed in, groaning, throwing his head back as he did. Stefano matched his motion, his octave, and he slid in easily, safely until he was half way inside. Then he placed his hands on either side of Stefano’s waist and waited a moment before pulling out an inch and rocking gently in.

“Favore… Per favore,” Stefano was gasping so quietly, urging, hands reaching and grabbing Sebastian’s hips, pulling him closer, trying to get more of his thicker cock into him. It was so hot, watching Stefano act so desperately, try to impale himself, shudder and beg as Sebastian finally slid all of the way in so that his testicles rested against Stefano’s cheeks.

“Now,” Stefano whined, looking up at him, flushed, “Now, please, now.”

Sebastian didn’t trust his own words. He nodded and pulled out a bit before fucking back in. He was trying to go slow, keep the motions simple and shallow, but Stefano was moaning and tightening and pushing against him, trying to get more of him. They’d never done this and Sebastian had become resigned to always receiving Stefano, would have been happy to, but he’d never expected such a glorious response.

“Harder?”

Stefano grabbed him, pulling him closer, “Di piu, dammi di piu! Please, oh merda, please, I need you, Sebastian!”

Sebastian gave in, upping the rhythm, matching how fast Stefano fucked him at the beginning, still too slow for either of them but getting there, something worth both of their time. Stefano’s voice changed pitch, the moans growing louder and more desperate. He wrapped his legs around Sebastian’s waist, making him go deeper.

“Merda, merda, merda, merda! Sebastian! Please!”

“You like this, Stefano?” Sebastian asked, face buried in his hair, in his neck. “You want me to go faster?”

He felt Stefano nod against him and the next moan sounded like a punch to the gut as Sebastian slammed into him hard enough for the slap to be audible. The angle was changing, Sebastian’s knees unfolding as he became more and more on top of Stefano, Stefano’s back curling so that Sebastian was almost pile driving into him.

“You think you can come like this?” Sebastian asked, “Shit, Stefano, I’m sorry, you’re just, god, you’re so beautiful like this. I wish I could keep you like this. You think, you think next time, we could bring your camera in here? I want you to see this. I need you to see this.”

Stefano’s face was lax, his hair a mess, revealing his hidden scars, his mouth open in a perfect o as the moans tumbled from them. He opened his eye, just a little, and he nodded, though Sebastian didn’t know what he was agreeing to.

He didn’t touch his cock then, just ran his clean fingers against Stefano’s jaw, pounding into him harder, making the bed frame hit against the wall with their rhythm.

“Feel so good, Stefano, so good around me. Can I? I’m going to come. Can I?”

Again, Stefano nodded and Sebastian shoved in a few more times, losing the rhythm and right when he thought he was going to come Stefano’s moaning broke into silence, his eye open and wide, his body tightening around Sebastian as he came all over his thighs and stomach. If Sebastian wasn’t so close that would have forced him over the edge anyway and he grunted harshly as he gave in to his own orgasm, his cock twitching inside of his lover as it emptied itself into him.

Stefano’s legs released him and fell to either side and he relaxed against Stefano’s chest, lying on top of him. For a long while they just breathed, holding one another, warmed by each other’s pressure. Stefano still felt fantastic wrapped around his fading erection and Sebastian wanted to stay there.

“I’ll get something to clean us up,” he promised, kissing Stefano on the cheek before pulling out, feeling the cold hit his chest. “You okay?”

Stefano rolled onto his side, but his face was open and a bit dopey and he looked up at Sebastian as if Sebastian was deserving of any part of him.

“I’m better than okay, Sebastian…” he held out his hand, not letting Sebastian leave for towels just yet. Sebastian took it, of course, and Stefano ran his thumb over the callouses, “Thank you. I know I can be difficult.”

Sebastian leaned down to kiss his temple, “And you know that I am persistent to a fault. You come to me if you’re ever feeling like that, yeah? I may not be a therapist, but I’ve seen my share of them. I’ll do what I can.”

“A distraction seems to be good enough, most of the time.” He released Sebastian’s hand with a yawn. He was relaxed and safe here and that was a feeling neither of them ever thought they would feel after what had happened to them. Sebastian had made it almost all of the way to the master bathroom before Stefano spoke again and, while Stefano had said the words before, he’d never done so with such conviction, such certainty, and it made Sebastian suck in a deep breath as his heart pounded loud against his temple.

“I love you, Sebastian.”

“Stefano,” he said, putting his hand on the door frame and looking back at him over his shoulder, “I love you too, so very much.”


End file.
